To: My Future Comcast Overlords, From: Revenue Source #315089

Actual Founder of Comcast

To Whom It May Obviously Not Concern Because I'm A Human Being With Real Needs And Resources Too Limited To Take You To Court For Flagrantly Violating American Anti-Trust Laws In Any Form Less Substantial Than A Class Action Suit Co-Authored By Ten Million Of My Closest Friends With The Support Of A Frighteningly Large Law Firm Or Some Sort Of Erin Brockovich Redux,

Upon learning about Comcast's intention to purchase the National Broadcasting Company (NBC) along with its massive French counterpart Vivendi I, an average American of modest means, began to nurse some concerns for the future of my ability to openly and freely utilize modern communications technology. You see, I am but a simple American and I have very little love or patience for massive corporations that use ruthless methods and an army of lawyers to make sure their multi-billion-dollar empires continue to profit more than the entirety of the African continent or a significant portion of small European countries. This is possibly just paranoia born of ignorance, but I have reason to believe that you, the Comcast Corporation, do not have the best interests of your customers or even the present and future states of communications in mind.

You see, I recall not too long ago when your immodest company violated net neutrality laws, which are just logical extensions of the principles of Free Speech that have been a cornerstone of American culture in some form since our proud country's founding. While I can understand how a gigantic cable company like yours would be wary of peer-to-peer file sharing, it was more than a little heavy-handed to outright block peer-to-peer websites on your Internet service in clear breach of your own service contract's customer privacy clause and then lie to authorities when they plainly inquired into these dubious activities. With such behaviors in your recent history, I hope you can see how I, among others, can be suspicious of your intentions in acquiring such a large portion of the world's media.

Given the iffy nature of our government I am not entirely confident that your bald-faced attempt at monopoly will be legally classified as such and thus disallowed by our admittedly pliable representatives. As we approach what looks like an inevitable Comcast/NBC future, I would like to address some issues that will most certainly arise from your devious merger.

First, you should know that turning Hulu into a pay service will place that once and currently admirable streaming site into the same perpetual, purgatorial hospice as Napster and it will thus become a giant money pit for your already outmoded and wasteful corporation. As a fresh crop of new streaming sites, both legitimate and pirate-based, blossom from the barely-living husk of Hulu you will be faced with the unenviable choice between a losing competition with services superior to your own and an unwinnable war of litigation with effectively millions of anonymous P2P-using individuals around the world.

As for your likely attempts to filter, censor and otherwise control Internet content and surfing trends, I'll ask that you simply look into the history of other, more sweeping examples of failed Internet control. If the considerable resources and relative brutality of totalitarian regimes like those in early 21st century China and modern-day Iran can't stop people from using the Internet however they damn well please, your corporation certainly won't be able to, either.

Also, you should note that you're purchasing the worst-performing network currently on television. Despite one or two decent programs, NBC is a laughing stock that is only staying afloat because The Office doesn't suck yet. The apple of your eye is being beaten by Fox. Think about that one for a moment before you sign those new contracts.

I will leave you with one final warning, oh future would-be overlords of all American media. Empires tend to crumble at times of over-extension and too much ambition. Society doesn't suffer tyrants for long, especially when there are other options present. Considering that you can't even keep your cable service from cutting out at least once a month, you might want to reconsider whether you're even capable of turning your already unwieldy, money-eating beast of a corporation into a floundering behemoth with a peacock's plume.

With Sincere Concern,

-Revenue Source #315089